When I think of him
I wish that I recieve him in the form of someone else
And I can blame it on the drinks
but I think
this was real
It was like something I had dreamed so long before to feel
magical and surreal
here it was finally
right next to me
arms around me
held me like no one ever had
hand in mines
as he told me everything on his mind
as I listened with open ears and an open mind
lost track of time
I
dont understand what exactly it was he did to make me give a shit whether this is the last time or not
I feel guilty for wishing it was with someone else tho
like why couldnt the ex continue to make me feel this way
& I wonder why the first had to be so selfish
this love thing has become a live thing
and I live for these moments
these moments where everything is still
its just his eyes and mines
where I feel
like he's the most amazing person
i shouldnt be holding on to that moment
as if it will be the last
but the past has proven that I get moments
None of us get forever but can I get the possiblitity?
Can I get maybe or a probably?
Something besides clinging to minutes and seconds
the thought of us seems unreal , impratical and a little illogical
but thats what love is
thats what life is
so I continue to live for our moments
in hopes that we can roll the dice and land
on forever
together

player.lover. as he tries to do while undercover

player by day

lover by night

play her by dayl

ove her by night

I was baby instantly since the day we met

though I dont see anything mongamous with him

He says he wants to be with me

and that he is

So I guess he's honest

because he never said only me

Call me psychic better just call me foolish

I see him on the creep as well, in the sheets

with this one and that one it aint hard to tell

saying this that , that and the third

and still have nerve to ask me for the pussy

I see words

he says to me I love you

and though his eyes read truth

as if he really wants to believe that

as if he hopes one day that he can say that and feel that

I tell him its all in what you do

Its not in the things you say

Its everything you do

that would make me believe the

"i love you"

Words was all I ever got with him

Promises

baby I promise this , I promise that

I know he cant seperate love and lust

He claims I'm everything he wants

but when she comes along

and she's less demanding

who gets left standing for love?

This time it wont be me

because I'm not as quick this time to believe

I mean

I used to get calls at three in the morning to say nothing but give me a chance

give me the time of day

And after a 99 times what am I to say?

Why not?

So I do

and this I love you

will be full of shit too

at least I can say I tried